fear of falling is....[prelude to umbrella]

...is not knowing if that person will actually be there to catch you; if you're taking a risk on an empty notion in that smallest thought of him not knowing who you are. It's wondering if that person sees you just as much as you see him, or if his words are offerings to keep hope alive on a string. I've been down that road before, where many offer just simple promises and never deliver, they have joy out of watching girls fall only to crash in the end. It's the suffering of not knowing that kills me everyday and that is why I have an umbrella it's my safety net and let's me fall slowly, not so fast so I don't get hurt in the process but the main question is...do I keep holding on to it..the fears, the uncertainty,  or let it go?....but that is why we have faith and that is why we believe...because faith is the assurance of things unseen that have yet to come.....