one of my newer routines is to the song "Yellow Raincoat". I love this song because it is something I can relate to especially I tend to put out that I am happy yet guarded at the same time. Well the choreography and concept of the routine reflects the lyrics and song as well my idea of that. In the beginning of the routine it is basically me "taking off" all of the things that we see on the outside: fame, etc etc. and by the end of the routine the rain boots symbolise protection from walking in the rain and of course the yellow raincoat itself. So for the most part that is the concept of the routine and really don't know how else to describe but people had been asking what the meaning of the choreography and costuming was about...so now you all know!
much love,
Nat
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Q & As
so since was able to get some questions during downtime while finishing up my rounds here are some ones I've chosen to blog and answer, keep them coming always keep me entertained :-]
Q: What age did you start dancing?
A: I started dancing at the age of 6 mainly ballet then when I was older I took up modern and I love both! Now I am a professional burlesque dancer wouldn't change it for the world!!
Q: Do you get offended when you say, "burlesque performer" and people say "stripper"?
A: No, actually. I mean people will call it whatever they want regardless how a person will explain it. Burlesque isn't always about taking clothes off and a lot of people fail to see what a beautiful art form it is; it's more than that and yes there are some elements of taking clothes off [stripping came from burlesque dancing] but hey people say what they want...does it offend me? Not at all, I love what I do and know how I perform and what goes on and the pagers know that is all that counts for me.
Q: If you could sleep with any celebrity who would it be?
A: uuuummmmm well awkward question LOL [those super close to me know this answer]
Q: What do you notice first on a guy?
A: his eyes. I love a guy with amazing eyes...and nice lips!!
Q: What would your ideal first date be like?
A: pizza, video games...bowling maybe even though I suck at it!! anything where we could just be normal and have fun.
Q: Why don't you like the media?
A: isn't that I don't like the media, I just don't have much respect for them and that is because how they report things. I mean everything always manages to come out screwed up or twisted or not even remotely to the truth, but I learned that comes with the territory and it comes along with certain people so I don't let it bother me anymore I really don't, people will say whatever so just be happy and live life best can.
Q: Are you single or dating anyone?
A: it's complicated/I plead the fifth. I will say there is someone important to me and leaving it at that.
Q: Rumors are that you are heading back to LA?
A: maybe....:-)
Q: Who is the "Dream King"?
A: well most of the references are inside jokes created around Tori Amos lyrics it's something my close friends and I do a lot and Dream King is in reference to one of my big brother's band mates when and if I ever perform a Tori Amos it's why my best mates burst out in hysterics whenever I sing that.
Q: Is it annoying when people compare you to Angelina Jolie or Dita von Teese?
A: Not at all. I think Angelina is amazing, talented, gorgeous and has a big heart. I can relate to her story quite a bit actually; so it doesn't bother me one bit, besides she gets to go home to Brad Pitt but for me exchange Brad for Justin Bieber I would be a very happy lady. As far Dita comparisons I don't think I've been a burlesque dancer for that long but if people are comparing me already I am so thankful and honoured, she's so talented.
Q: Favorite quote?
A: One of them, "quod me nutruit me detruit" whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger....
Q: Do you think you're reckless?
A: I'm not a rebel without a cause if that is what you mean
Q: Do you mind if beliebers follow you on twitter?
A: NO! I LOVE them!! I honestly have the utmost respect and love for beliebers and yes will defend them to the moon and back and same applies to my pagers...don't mess with my pagers!!
Q: Who thought of pagers?
A: Originally it was pageans and thought that was a little weird and saying "pagan" so no haha so we went with pagers instead.
Q: What about family, dating and performing?
A: If I eventually become a Mum I would definitely focus more of my time on that same as a relationship because I am the type of girlfriend who would want to support her king I mean really...but hey just me! I don't see myself performing forever when the time is right we'll know....
Q: What age did you start dancing?
A: I started dancing at the age of 6 mainly ballet then when I was older I took up modern and I love both! Now I am a professional burlesque dancer wouldn't change it for the world!!
Q: Do you get offended when you say, "burlesque performer" and people say "stripper"?
A: No, actually. I mean people will call it whatever they want regardless how a person will explain it. Burlesque isn't always about taking clothes off and a lot of people fail to see what a beautiful art form it is; it's more than that and yes there are some elements of taking clothes off [stripping came from burlesque dancing] but hey people say what they want...does it offend me? Not at all, I love what I do and know how I perform and what goes on and the pagers know that is all that counts for me.
Q: If you could sleep with any celebrity who would it be?
A: uuuummmmm well awkward question LOL [those super close to me know this answer]
Q: What do you notice first on a guy?
A: his eyes. I love a guy with amazing eyes...and nice lips!!
Q: What would your ideal first date be like?
A: pizza, video games...bowling maybe even though I suck at it!! anything where we could just be normal and have fun.
Q: Why don't you like the media?
A: isn't that I don't like the media, I just don't have much respect for them and that is because how they report things. I mean everything always manages to come out screwed up or twisted or not even remotely to the truth, but I learned that comes with the territory and it comes along with certain people so I don't let it bother me anymore I really don't, people will say whatever so just be happy and live life best can.
Q: Are you single or dating anyone?
A: it's complicated/I plead the fifth. I will say there is someone important to me and leaving it at that.
Q: Rumors are that you are heading back to LA?
A: maybe....:-)
Q: Who is the "Dream King"?
A: well most of the references are inside jokes created around Tori Amos lyrics it's something my close friends and I do a lot and Dream King is in reference to one of my big brother's band mates when and if I ever perform a Tori Amos it's why my best mates burst out in hysterics whenever I sing that.
Q: Is it annoying when people compare you to Angelina Jolie or Dita von Teese?
A: Not at all. I think Angelina is amazing, talented, gorgeous and has a big heart. I can relate to her story quite a bit actually; so it doesn't bother me one bit, besides she gets to go home to Brad Pitt but for me exchange Brad for Justin Bieber I would be a very happy lady. As far Dita comparisons I don't think I've been a burlesque dancer for that long but if people are comparing me already I am so thankful and honoured, she's so talented.
Q: Favorite quote?
A: One of them, "quod me nutruit me detruit" whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger....
Q: Do you think you're reckless?
A: I'm not a rebel without a cause if that is what you mean
Q: Do you mind if beliebers follow you on twitter?
A: NO! I LOVE them!! I honestly have the utmost respect and love for beliebers and yes will defend them to the moon and back and same applies to my pagers...don't mess with my pagers!!
Q: Who thought of pagers?
A: Originally it was pageans and thought that was a little weird and saying "pagan" so no haha so we went with pagers instead.
Q: What about family, dating and performing?
A: If I eventually become a Mum I would definitely focus more of my time on that same as a relationship because I am the type of girlfriend who would want to support her king I mean really...but hey just me! I don't see myself performing forever when the time is right we'll know....
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
the only thoughts in my mind right now are.....
I've been swinging around me cause I don't know when you'll make your move.....
Monday, March 25, 2013
I really don't....
know what to blog!! I feel as if haven't blogged about anything in ages and no I haven't been in "hiding" or anything like that just been working hard on routines and having a hectic schedule regarding shows and photo shoots. Since my formspring account will no longer be active really don't know about the Q & As...unless tweet me more questions and will answer honestly as possibly can!!
Last week's show was a success. I am so thankful for pagers for coming out and also a special shout out to our troops for showing love last weekend! I have so much respect and gratitude for our troops for helping to keep us safe and free...hoping to do something special over the summer...keep an eye out!!
traveling...I will begin traveling again in June/July so expect me all over the place! Also there are some magazines who been asked to work with quite a while ago so going to finally give it a try.
music...I have no intentions of recording...as mentioned before songwriting and writing in general is my own way of keeping a diary...I really have no wishes to record them but will however may do some benefit shows in a few months but that is the extent of me and actually performing music wise.
"normal" life stuff: most have been aware I have been pondering between pursuing performing with my troupe full time and honestly...still do not know as of yet. I love nursing and so thankful for all the lessons I learned thus far but perhaps later this year I will consider it even more [but I am leaning more towards that way however performing that is].
tattoos...yes I am planning a couple more tattoos! one in Polish and the other is to finish up the one on my left shoulder....[because people have been asking haha!]
personal life....no comments. I mean I see the comments people asking about my personal life and for right now at least not discussing it.....
that is pretty much all the updates....keep chasing dreams, break the rules [safely, hehe] and follow your heart....
much love
Nat
Last week's show was a success. I am so thankful for pagers for coming out and also a special shout out to our troops for showing love last weekend! I have so much respect and gratitude for our troops for helping to keep us safe and free...hoping to do something special over the summer...keep an eye out!!
traveling...I will begin traveling again in June/July so expect me all over the place! Also there are some magazines who been asked to work with quite a while ago so going to finally give it a try.
music...I have no intentions of recording...as mentioned before songwriting and writing in general is my own way of keeping a diary...I really have no wishes to record them but will however may do some benefit shows in a few months but that is the extent of me and actually performing music wise.
"normal" life stuff: most have been aware I have been pondering between pursuing performing with my troupe full time and honestly...still do not know as of yet. I love nursing and so thankful for all the lessons I learned thus far but perhaps later this year I will consider it even more [but I am leaning more towards that way however performing that is].
tattoos...yes I am planning a couple more tattoos! one in Polish and the other is to finish up the one on my left shoulder....[because people have been asking haha!]
personal life....no comments. I mean I see the comments people asking about my personal life and for right now at least not discussing it.....
that is pretty much all the updates....keep chasing dreams, break the rules [safely, hehe] and follow your heart....
much love
Nat
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
quotable page edition 2.0
these are as most know thoughts too long to make it as tweets.
enjoy.
much love,
Nat
"I love being a burlesque performer besides ballet it is a form of dance I just simply fell in love with. I love how it is such a form of artistic freedom and love it because it is different than ballet it isn't as structured. I also find it challenging because I want to go out and choreograph a routine but then have to remember the certain elements of burlesque have to correlate into the routine as well making it understandable for the audience. I like being out there with my performances and it makes me feel like playing dress up; love the costumes, glitter, make up yea that is the girl side of me in many aspects".
"People had been asking me for the last week about MC's [not Mariah Carey for the record] diss regarding me being a burlesque performer. You know, I wish it was as simple as just taking my shirt off [which 9 times out of 10 most don't even which shows her ignorance] honestly, I've never even met her and for her to throw a diss out there like that is actually quite funny to me but then again you know you're something great when people you don't even know hate on you"
"I am a closet romantic most definitely. I love the idea of domineering but in a healthy sense; I think there is nothing more scary or romantic than completely surrendering yourself to a guy. Yea, I'm weird not going to lie but there is also an element of trust like can I trust this guy enough to give up a part of myself...yea that is what I am looking for"
"I did that single because trend because it is true...but I never mentioned I was single or anything else about my romantic life. In the past yes and sadly that is why my relationship with GW never worked out. Sure, he is a great guy [in hindsight] but our worlds are too different. He's in the gym scene and I'm in the performance scene so him being around a performer think he is looking more for a Betty Crocker type of girlfriend and that's okay it's his choice. Did I choose for how it ultimately played out? Of course not but oh well I'm in a much happier place now"
"People always ask if I am single, dating something etc...let's just leave it as 'it's complicated' and that is my way of saying don't want to answer that"
"I am so not a morning person. I don't get how people can wake up so chipper in the mornings. I just want to pull the covers back over my head and beat my alarm clock, but sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do"
"Smile at people who are annoyed by you, really just go up to them and smile then watch their facial expressions. It makes them wonder what on Earth is she up to"
"I grew up speaking French and Russian. I love speaking both languages but I also grew up hearing Serbian because that is where my Godfather is from. Honestly, if I could choose places to live it would be France, Canada or in California somewhere I feel more at home in those places"
"the song romeo + juliet is the most personal song for me because I am actually writing about a personal experience and seeing what is happening around me and think it is why it was the hardest song for me to write. Am I dissing anyone in it no not at all...but the overall message is to show that girls can break really great guys just as much girls claim guys break them. Sure every relationship has two sides but sometimes it makes us wonder though and think it is easier for girls in society to always play the martyr when in some cases it's the other way around...it's the girls doing the damage and guys don't say anything because society tells them...hey they're guys deal with it".....
enjoy.
much love,
Nat
"I love being a burlesque performer besides ballet it is a form of dance I just simply fell in love with. I love how it is such a form of artistic freedom and love it because it is different than ballet it isn't as structured. I also find it challenging because I want to go out and choreograph a routine but then have to remember the certain elements of burlesque have to correlate into the routine as well making it understandable for the audience. I like being out there with my performances and it makes me feel like playing dress up; love the costumes, glitter, make up yea that is the girl side of me in many aspects".
"People had been asking me for the last week about MC's [not Mariah Carey for the record] diss regarding me being a burlesque performer. You know, I wish it was as simple as just taking my shirt off [which 9 times out of 10 most don't even which shows her ignorance] honestly, I've never even met her and for her to throw a diss out there like that is actually quite funny to me but then again you know you're something great when people you don't even know hate on you"
"I am a closet romantic most definitely. I love the idea of domineering but in a healthy sense; I think there is nothing more scary or romantic than completely surrendering yourself to a guy. Yea, I'm weird not going to lie but there is also an element of trust like can I trust this guy enough to give up a part of myself...yea that is what I am looking for"
"I did that single because trend because it is true...but I never mentioned I was single or anything else about my romantic life. In the past yes and sadly that is why my relationship with GW never worked out. Sure, he is a great guy [in hindsight] but our worlds are too different. He's in the gym scene and I'm in the performance scene so him being around a performer think he is looking more for a Betty Crocker type of girlfriend and that's okay it's his choice. Did I choose for how it ultimately played out? Of course not but oh well I'm in a much happier place now"
"People always ask if I am single, dating something etc...let's just leave it as 'it's complicated' and that is my way of saying don't want to answer that"
"I am so not a morning person. I don't get how people can wake up so chipper in the mornings. I just want to pull the covers back over my head and beat my alarm clock, but sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do"
"Smile at people who are annoyed by you, really just go up to them and smile then watch their facial expressions. It makes them wonder what on Earth is she up to"
"I grew up speaking French and Russian. I love speaking both languages but I also grew up hearing Serbian because that is where my Godfather is from. Honestly, if I could choose places to live it would be France, Canada or in California somewhere I feel more at home in those places"
"the song romeo + juliet is the most personal song for me because I am actually writing about a personal experience and seeing what is happening around me and think it is why it was the hardest song for me to write. Am I dissing anyone in it no not at all...but the overall message is to show that girls can break really great guys just as much girls claim guys break them. Sure every relationship has two sides but sometimes it makes us wonder though and think it is easier for girls in society to always play the martyr when in some cases it's the other way around...it's the girls doing the damage and guys don't say anything because society tells them...hey they're guys deal with it".....
Monday, March 18, 2013
romeo + juliet [back story/repost]
I am writing this again about the back story to the song romeo + juliet. I originally wrote the lyrics and posted them some time ago around December but have since been reworking and for some reason as of today started writing actual music to it [which hardly happens for me except for one other song I've ever written]. See, for me writing lyrics has been simply my way of expressing things and started writing them at about 14 [my Mum encouraged me as well my English teacher] because it just seemed to help me cope with so many things growing up.
Anyway all of that is besides the point right now but the back story to romeo + juliet is simply that; as most may know Romeo was involved with Rosaline before he met Juliet. It has also taken me the longest to complete this song because it is also the most personal song I've ever written because it is somewhat about what has been going on in my life emotions, etc of not just me but others around me as well. It is also another reason why I've been so protective of it; but as most just write what I feel/experience and just at a point where I feel comfortable enough sharing the full version of this song [because the original version posted was just a draft, unfinished].
I also want to reiterate it is not meant as a "diss" towards anyone at all just writing what was going on at the time and still going on; I'm a very private person which is one reason I love writing song lyrics/poetry because it's open to interpretation without being too out there but nonetheless it is what it is. But overall [and it's long winded] the gist of the song is about how girls can be just as cruel as men when it comes to relationships, really great guys can be broken by girls just as much as girls can be broken by guys, so I know I mentioned soon but seriously give me maybe a few days the most because I am a perfectionist and will post the full finished version all I ask is please do not take my song lyrics that I post on here without my permission.
much love
Nat
Anyway all of that is besides the point right now but the back story to romeo + juliet is simply that; as most may know Romeo was involved with Rosaline before he met Juliet. It has also taken me the longest to complete this song because it is also the most personal song I've ever written because it is somewhat about what has been going on in my life emotions, etc of not just me but others around me as well. It is also another reason why I've been so protective of it; but as most just write what I feel/experience and just at a point where I feel comfortable enough sharing the full version of this song [because the original version posted was just a draft, unfinished].
I also want to reiterate it is not meant as a "diss" towards anyone at all just writing what was going on at the time and still going on; I'm a very private person which is one reason I love writing song lyrics/poetry because it's open to interpretation without being too out there but nonetheless it is what it is. But overall [and it's long winded] the gist of the song is about how girls can be just as cruel as men when it comes to relationships, really great guys can be broken by girls just as much as girls can be broken by guys, so I know I mentioned soon but seriously give me maybe a few days the most because I am a perfectionist and will post the full finished version all I ask is please do not take my song lyrics that I post on here without my permission.
much love
Nat
Q & A time!
Hey Loves,
yes haven't been answering Q & As for some time well I forgot my formspring password so had to create another account, but keep the questions coming and the new one is formspring.com/nataliepage14
much love
Nat
Q: Sneakers or sandals?
A: that is a tough one! I love sneaks more so converse they are so comfy!! in the summer time I do like sandals though especially when hanging out on the beach and that feeling of having sand in my toes, yea I am a weirdo haha.
Q: Would you ever get a tattoo?
A: I already have 9 tattoos! I love them and especially guys with tattoos :)
Q: Favorite cookie?
A: I am guilty to liking oreos LOL!
Q: Favorite vacation spot?
A: I love going to Canada in all honesty it's one of my favourite places to visit and love going back home to California and Texas ( I grew up in between the two states), but if it's just to chill with my friends Cocoa Beach, Florida has been our spot for so long!!
Q: Favorite exercise?
A: being a dancer I kind of hate the gym! LOL, but really to stay in shape I love dancing, yoga etc actually I am quite active and I do some light weight training but always loved sports and I played soccer when I was younger so definitely into that!
Q: Favorite foods?
A: I have kind of a bad habit of trying foods which sometimes works out all right other times it doesn't haha. But in general, I love sushi, Thai, and of course Russian food. Occasionally, I like to try Indian food I love exotic type of foods though, and being a vegetarian anything along those lines is great. So yes, I love facon!!!
Q: Favorite era for fashion?
A: definitely 1950s to the 1970s I love pin up style glamour like Grease etc think those eras were the most amazing fashion wise. I think fashion is just being comfortable in your own style and that could be skinny jeans all day I think every woman has her own sense of what is stylish and that is okay.
Q: Вы в любовь?
A:может быть :) но да есть кто-то, кого я уделяю много для, но сейчас это действительно частные
Q: What kind of guys do you like?
A: I like guys who are okay with being himself, kind and have a wicked sense of humour. Leaving it at that :)
Q: Which do you prefer? Twitter or Facebook?
A: I love twitter not going to lie! I think it's way more fun and able to connect with people easier I think and I know some say to me well you don't have loads and loads of followers yea but there are people who read my twitter account regularly who aren't following me; one reason I try to be so responsible about what I post and that should apply to everything we never know who is listening so always keep it positive regardless.
Q: What happened with your former best friend? Are you two still talking?
A: I don't like to go into details about it, but people just change and that's okay because we're still growing as people and I feel no matter our age we're still in the learning process of life. Am I saddened yes I am because it was someone whom I actually thought was one of my best friends. It basically turned into a Black Swan type of friendship to the point where it was becoming destructive and sometimes people allow things to go to their heads and sadly I've seen it happen many times with people I know they allow fame to get to them and change them which is why I am trying so hard to stay grounded and balanced in my life, it's really important to me.
Q: What are your thoughts on fame?
A: None really because I always grew up with it being "normal" my Dad was a novelist, my Mum was a runway model/musician and my brother was a musician so having a crazy, weird artistic family was always "normal" to me, for us our childhood was going to plays, theatre, finding creative outlets because my parents always encouraged us to do that from an early age; I honestly think there is no difference to "fame" except what a person does is magnified ten times more than if a person was a school teacher. They're all "normal" to me and it isn't that I don't fangirl or anything but if someone famous comes up to me I'm just like "oh hey, how are you"? and keep going it sounds corny but it's true they wake up just like everyone else, have bad days, fall in love, have kids, etc etc.
Q: What would a guy have to do to win you over?
A: oh geesh!! :-p be himself and just ask me!! I am being serious just come right out and ask me I will admit though I kind of suck of indirect flirting because I have an outgoing personality so just think everyone else is being the same way pretty much so have to admit at times I miss things then it'll dawn on me, but really just tell me I am a romantic at heart but not too mushy! Yea, I am a girl right? Also know I can be stubborn haha.
yes haven't been answering Q & As for some time well I forgot my formspring password so had to create another account, but keep the questions coming and the new one is formspring.com/nataliepage14
much love
Nat
Q: Sneakers or sandals?
A: that is a tough one! I love sneaks more so converse they are so comfy!! in the summer time I do like sandals though especially when hanging out on the beach and that feeling of having sand in my toes, yea I am a weirdo haha.
Q: Would you ever get a tattoo?
A: I already have 9 tattoos! I love them and especially guys with tattoos :)
Q: Favorite cookie?
A: I am guilty to liking oreos LOL!
Q: Favorite vacation spot?
A: I love going to Canada in all honesty it's one of my favourite places to visit and love going back home to California and Texas ( I grew up in between the two states), but if it's just to chill with my friends Cocoa Beach, Florida has been our spot for so long!!
Q: Favorite exercise?
A: being a dancer I kind of hate the gym! LOL, but really to stay in shape I love dancing, yoga etc actually I am quite active and I do some light weight training but always loved sports and I played soccer when I was younger so definitely into that!
Q: Favorite foods?
A: I have kind of a bad habit of trying foods which sometimes works out all right other times it doesn't haha. But in general, I love sushi, Thai, and of course Russian food. Occasionally, I like to try Indian food I love exotic type of foods though, and being a vegetarian anything along those lines is great. So yes, I love facon!!!
Q: Favorite era for fashion?
A: definitely 1950s to the 1970s I love pin up style glamour like Grease etc think those eras were the most amazing fashion wise. I think fashion is just being comfortable in your own style and that could be skinny jeans all day I think every woman has her own sense of what is stylish and that is okay.
Q: Вы в любовь?
A:может быть :) но да есть кто-то, кого я уделяю много для, но сейчас это действительно частные
Q: What kind of guys do you like?
A: I like guys who are okay with being himself, kind and have a wicked sense of humour. Leaving it at that :)
Q: Which do you prefer? Twitter or Facebook?
A: I love twitter not going to lie! I think it's way more fun and able to connect with people easier I think and I know some say to me well you don't have loads and loads of followers yea but there are people who read my twitter account regularly who aren't following me; one reason I try to be so responsible about what I post and that should apply to everything we never know who is listening so always keep it positive regardless.
Q: What happened with your former best friend? Are you two still talking?
A: I don't like to go into details about it, but people just change and that's okay because we're still growing as people and I feel no matter our age we're still in the learning process of life. Am I saddened yes I am because it was someone whom I actually thought was one of my best friends. It basically turned into a Black Swan type of friendship to the point where it was becoming destructive and sometimes people allow things to go to their heads and sadly I've seen it happen many times with people I know they allow fame to get to them and change them which is why I am trying so hard to stay grounded and balanced in my life, it's really important to me.
Q: What are your thoughts on fame?
A: None really because I always grew up with it being "normal" my Dad was a novelist, my Mum was a runway model/musician and my brother was a musician so having a crazy, weird artistic family was always "normal" to me, for us our childhood was going to plays, theatre, finding creative outlets because my parents always encouraged us to do that from an early age; I honestly think there is no difference to "fame" except what a person does is magnified ten times more than if a person was a school teacher. They're all "normal" to me and it isn't that I don't fangirl or anything but if someone famous comes up to me I'm just like "oh hey, how are you"? and keep going it sounds corny but it's true they wake up just like everyone else, have bad days, fall in love, have kids, etc etc.
Q: What would a guy have to do to win you over?
A: oh geesh!! :-p be himself and just ask me!! I am being serious just come right out and ask me I will admit though I kind of suck of indirect flirting because I have an outgoing personality so just think everyone else is being the same way pretty much so have to admit at times I miss things then it'll dawn on me, but really just tell me I am a romantic at heart but not too mushy! Yea, I am a girl right? Also know I can be stubborn haha.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
i put on my raincoat....
Yellow Raincoat is by far one of my favourite songs off the Believe Acoustic album; so much so I choreographed a routine to the song and will be performing it in a week and half for the first time. The song is one I can definitely relate to especially now with everything happening in my own life [regarding friends and some other personal issues] and I too have a tendency to let on that everything is "fine" when it's not. I too have a tendency to put on a raincoat to look happy to everyone on the outside but inside there is so much going on...I am a sea of secrets! I do have three really close friends with whom I confide in [in addition to someone else whom I feel I could confide in] But going to be completely honest it's really difficult for me to relate to people and for me communicating it is through music and dancing [or burlesque should say right now] it's what feels natural to me.
But, this song out of all spoke to me the most because as mentioned before can relate to putting that guard up to keep things and sometimes people out...basically a wall and think it is more for protection because I've been let down quite a bit by others, ex boyfriend etc. so yea I do have trust issues with people and it's hard for me to just let anyone in. So, yes I will be performing yellow raincoat and honestly really hope I can do the song and choreography justice because it's beautifully written music and lyrics.
Right now, it is for me not allowing all the negativity to affect me in ways it has done in the past and even now still; people will always have something negative to say or do and learned/ still learning how to cope with it all. I deal with it on a smaller scale so can only imagine on a much larger scale and don't know how my Mum and big brother dealt with it all. If anything I've learned this past month is I am human and make mistakes just like everyone and still trying to learn all of this in my world [burlesque].
I really cannot wait to perform this routine and excited actually in some sense, but yes it is a personal number for me because it is sort of letting my guard down and allowing the audience to see a glimpse of who I am as think something every performer does.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
But, this song out of all spoke to me the most because as mentioned before can relate to putting that guard up to keep things and sometimes people out...basically a wall and think it is more for protection because I've been let down quite a bit by others, ex boyfriend etc. so yea I do have trust issues with people and it's hard for me to just let anyone in. So, yes I will be performing yellow raincoat and honestly really hope I can do the song and choreography justice because it's beautifully written music and lyrics.
Right now, it is for me not allowing all the negativity to affect me in ways it has done in the past and even now still; people will always have something negative to say or do and learned/ still learning how to cope with it all. I deal with it on a smaller scale so can only imagine on a much larger scale and don't know how my Mum and big brother dealt with it all. If anything I've learned this past month is I am human and make mistakes just like everyone and still trying to learn all of this in my world [burlesque].
I really cannot wait to perform this routine and excited actually in some sense, but yes it is a personal number for me because it is sort of letting my guard down and allowing the audience to see a glimpse of who I am as think something every performer does.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
Monday, March 4, 2013
you can't dictate what matters or what is important to a woman
I love this interview because I see so much of myself in this interview and it is the one Dita interview which really spoke to me as a performer because could relate so much to it. Dita von Teese reminds me so much of myself then again we almost have the same birthday [she's two days after me] but I absolutely agree that it is an art form and another way to express glamour and beauty which are the things I adore about performing. Another aspect I can relate to is being different and something I champion is just being different in the world of burlesque; and like Dita it's just something at first thought would be for fun and not serious but how serious it is becoming and so proud of that. It means so much when young women contact me via twitter or at shows and tell me thank you for doing this because it means I can be "different" by society standards and still be beautiful. Which is why I adore my pagers they are amazing and it is them that keeps me going in this and want to keep on and see how much further can go with this.
But bottom line you can't dictate what makes us feel gorgeous as women or beautiful or sexy. For me it is just wearing jeans, heels and red lipstick and for another woman it may be something else; it is empowering as a woman to be in charge of her own sexuality and just knowing who you are and live up to that....confidence is one of the most sexiest things we can possess in both men and women.
So this is one of the many reasons Dita is one of my idols and thank you for inspiring me and many other women and hopefully able to follow in your footsteps but in my own way.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
But bottom line you can't dictate what makes us feel gorgeous as women or beautiful or sexy. For me it is just wearing jeans, heels and red lipstick and for another woman it may be something else; it is empowering as a woman to be in charge of her own sexuality and just knowing who you are and live up to that....confidence is one of the most sexiest things we can possess in both men and women.
So this is one of the many reasons Dita is one of my idols and thank you for inspiring me and many other women and hopefully able to follow in your footsteps but in my own way.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
Sunday, March 3, 2013
my thoughts on twitter....and "haters" [but it's all love]
I pretty much wanted to take the time to address my twitter and another subject [later] but first and foremost cannot thank everyone enough for following. Europe...I have nothing but love for you especially UK, France, Germany, Poland, Russia and Ukraine <3 I am so grateful to have so much love and support not only from family and friends but from the #pagers as well you have been so supportive since day one and cannot put into words how much you all mean to me. You all inspire me and believe me I see your tweets and words and I'm here, always will be.
Secondly, I know many want to have loads of followers but for me it really doesn't matter. The reason being is because there are many who do not follow me on twitter but do read what I post and it's another reason why I make attempts to be responsible about what I post on twitter. I do know that there are people out there who notice, reading and listening to what I have to say some may agree others may not but that's okay right? So just wanted to keep that in mind when people ask about me gaining followers because at this point for me it really isn't about that. Even if it is one person or one pager who feels inspired that would be enough for me, it truly would be. Also think we don't realise this because people do listen to us even though we may not be aware of it but they are.
Thirdly, the "haters" yes, I also receive some negative; you know what though? I haven't been responding because I just ignore it. Not everyone is going to like what you do especially when you're a performer and that's okay people will find various reasons to "hate" on someone. I have come to ignore it because I refuse to allow negative people chase me away from my dreams and the people I love. I am done with allowing my own fears and in the past allowing negative people deter me from what is truly important and that is not happening anymore and if anything it makes me even more determined to succeed mainly to be content with my life no matter what happens in it. So yes, I am aware of the negativity but just so you all are aware...it's being ignored because I'd much rather focus on the positivity that is out there.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
Secondly, I know many want to have loads of followers but for me it really doesn't matter. The reason being is because there are many who do not follow me on twitter but do read what I post and it's another reason why I make attempts to be responsible about what I post on twitter. I do know that there are people out there who notice, reading and listening to what I have to say some may agree others may not but that's okay right? So just wanted to keep that in mind when people ask about me gaining followers because at this point for me it really isn't about that. Even if it is one person or one pager who feels inspired that would be enough for me, it truly would be. Also think we don't realise this because people do listen to us even though we may not be aware of it but they are.
Thirdly, the "haters" yes, I also receive some negative; you know what though? I haven't been responding because I just ignore it. Not everyone is going to like what you do especially when you're a performer and that's okay people will find various reasons to "hate" on someone. I have come to ignore it because I refuse to allow negative people chase me away from my dreams and the people I love. I am done with allowing my own fears and in the past allowing negative people deter me from what is truly important and that is not happening anymore and if anything it makes me even more determined to succeed mainly to be content with my life no matter what happens in it. So yes, I am aware of the negativity but just so you all are aware...it's being ignored because I'd much rather focus on the positivity that is out there.
xoxo
much love,
Nat
Friday, March 1, 2013
your fight is my fight....
Ever since my parents and my big brother I never really had much fondness for the media and can only imagine with the paparazzi just being there at every moment and not allowing for anyone to have a moment of peace. I sincerely wish that the media [mainly paparazzi] would learn to respect other's privacy as breaking personal property, yelling obscenities, and becoming physical isn't necessary. I mean what do they expect especially when that person is already giving everything to most? A person should be allowed to have something for himself. Our generation has become so antisocial anymore these days to where personal boundaries aren't respected and even to an extent where a sense of entitlement is involved. If a person does not wish to discuss/share/make public something he should be allowed to do so, period. end of story. It also makes me worry about my sisters who are over in Europe especially with their private lives and makes me wonder if the media will react the same way towards them?
People need to get a grip and realize that he [Justin] is putting his own safety out there because he enjoys what he is doing [as other performers] and sure that all comes along with the territory fine get all that but there really needs to be a limit as to what should be allowed in order to protect the safety of not only Justin but others as well. I will admit, I have nothing but love and respect for beliebers [and pagers have your backs too] and will defend them to the moon and back [and have always said this] but even more so protective of Justin. Paps seriously need to just back down no story or photo is worth over someone's safety. So am I disgusted right now...very much so people really need to learn respect.
All I can say is so sorry his [Justin's] day ultimately was ruined and it breaks my heart to hear about it and it also pisses me off, so don't make me come to Europe.....
People need to get a grip and realize that he [Justin] is putting his own safety out there because he enjoys what he is doing [as other performers] and sure that all comes along with the territory fine get all that but there really needs to be a limit as to what should be allowed in order to protect the safety of not only Justin but others as well. I will admit, I have nothing but love and respect for beliebers [and pagers have your backs too] and will defend them to the moon and back [and have always said this] but even more so protective of Justin. Paps seriously need to just back down no story or photo is worth over someone's safety. So am I disgusted right now...very much so people really need to learn respect.
All I can say is so sorry his [Justin's] day ultimately was ruined and it breaks my heart to hear about it and it also pisses me off, so don't make me come to Europe.....
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