2013 playlist for the year

Here are the songs that made 2013 very memorable in many ways :)

January

Waiting Game- Banks
Bouncing Off Clouds- Tori Amos
Brightly Wound- Eisley

February

Shadowboxer- Fiona Apple
Empire State of Mind- Jay Z/ Alicia Keys
Fashion Killa- A$AP Rocky

March

Why Can't I?- Liz  Phair
Breathe Me- Sia
Firework- Katy Perry

April

Fallen- Sarah McLachlan
Water Me- FKA Twigs
Psychobabble- Frou Frou

May

Rack City- Tyga
Hollywood-Madonna
Gone-Lisa Marie Presley

June

Summer Fling- Willow Smith
4AM- Kaskade
A Case of You-Joni Mitchell

July

I Don't Care- Lil Twist/ Chris Brown
Lose Yourself-Eminem
Breathe- Of Verona

August

Super Bass- Nicki Minaj
Spiders-Lovedrug
No One Really Wins- Copeland

September

Echo Park- Ryan Cabrera
Bittersweet- Ellie Goulding
Romeo + Juliet


October

Don't Make Me Come to Vegas- Tori Amos
Unwinding Cable Car- anberlin
All Around Me- Flyleaf

November

Out of the Woods- Heather Evans
These Boots are Made for Walking- Nancy Sinatra
Me and Bobby McGee- Janis Joplin

December

Empathy- Alanis Morissette
Undone-Mayday
To Tell You

everything isn't all bad...

It's another, if it ain't one thing
Instigators, like puttin' fire on propane
The wrong thing, they be worried 'bout
 you know females
And how they like to run their mouths

Wanna be,  just like, talk like, you
Like you 
Misery, misery, loves company
Don't let 'em change your mood 


They try to get at me 
Behind your back 
Try'na tell me that I'm just like the others
But I ain't all bad

No, no, I ain't all bad
All bad, all bad
I ain't all bad
All bad, all bad

I might make you mad, so mad
My bad, no, no, I ain't all bad

Between us, they wanna come in
Your worst enemy sometimes be your best friend
Perfect, ain't sayin' that I am
Proven, least I'm provin' that I give a damn

Wanna be, wanna be everything I outta be to you 
Envy, envy, same thing as jealousy
Jealous of you
That's what they do


They try to get at me 
Behind your back 
Try'na tell me that I'm just like the others
But I ain't all bad

No, no, I ain't all bad
All bad, all bad
I ain't all bad
All bad, all bad

I might make you mad, so mad
My bad, no, no, I ain't all bad

my autobiography in song

She's addicted to nicotine patches
She's afraid of the light in the dark
6:58 are you sure where my spark is
Here

She's convinced she could hold back a glacier
But she couldn't keep her Mother alive
Doubting if there's a woman in there somewhere
Here

You say you don't want it again
And again but you don't really mean it
You say you don't want it
This circus we're in
But you don't you don't really mean it
You don't really mean it
if the Divine master plan is perfection
Maybe next I'll give Judas a try
Trusting my soul to the ice cream assassin
Here

You say you don't want it again
And again but you don't really mean it
You say you don't want it
This circus we're in
But you don't you don't really mean it
You don't really mean it
How may fates turn around in the overtime
Ballerinas that have fins that you'll never find
You thought that you were the bomb yeah
Well so did I
Say you don't want it
Say you don't want it again
And again but you don't really mean it
Say you don't want it
This circus we're in
But you don't you don't really mean it
You don't really mean it

She's addicted to nicotine patches
She's afraid of the light in the dark
6:58 are you sure where my spark is
Here
-Spark

I honestly can't see myself doing anything else except for giving

It would surprise most people that I also work in the nursing field and actually it is surprising even to myself. But, before my Mum died she made me promise I would return to school before pursuing anything in the arts; she always said it was a good idea especially for me because music in many ways can still write, produce etc but with dancing we're somewhat limited to an extent. I also think she wanted me to learn from her own life because after music for my Mum it was always what is next out of life? I don't think she regretted anything in her life but there were moments often wondered if she did at some point; my Mum did attend college but she studies arts, music etc nothing else that as in the "real world" would suffice to make a "living". In the end we were okay, and material possessions weren't always the main thing at least not for us and life was all right that way.
  Even though my brother had an amazing career as a professional musician...believe it or not he still maintained his "regular" job as a systems analyst. In other ways as well, I think it helped keep us all humble and I know and realise now that with nursing it has done that and in many ways I feel I need this to help keep me grounded and in the irony sane.
  I came to the "calling" for nursing due to the fact I love helping people in general; making them smile and giving them comfort has been the greatest joy for me bottom line...I am happiest when I am giving in some sort of way, and it helps me feel as I am making a difference in this world even though it is small but to one person it is more than enough.
   Through nursing I have met some of the most bravest and strong individuals and they all have touched me in some way or another and will never forget them. They always say you must be the change you hope to see in the world and hope to contribute to that in some way or another.
  Giving is the greatest of joys on this Earth and it is making life better for another person. I think as a society we become so wrapped up in social media, ourselves, problems that we forget to look at the world around us and see that there are people who are truly suffering, who don't have the very things we take for granted every single day. And it is the one reason I don't think I could ever fully give up nursing no matter how far dancing and performing may take me in this life.
 So always try to be good and kind to one another, life is too precious to be negative try to spread as much  positivity as possible. This world needs it so much. Always giveback.

much love

Natalie

she's confident

I think confidence is being comfortable enough with yourself to not worry about what others think of you and it’s also how you make others feel about themselves. A confident person is comfortable enough with herself where she doesn’t have to put others down or make fun of them because she knows who she is as a person and secure in herself . We oftentimes think it's solely based on looks but confidence is really more of a personality and how positive you are towards other people.  So you can be the most beautiful person in the world but if not confidence in yourself or very insecure the looks don't mean much. I think us as individuals we all have a different mindset as to what we think is confident/sexy and for me it's just being comfortable, sense of humour and intelligence. To me, I think there is nothing sexier than a person with confidence and secure in him/herself.

-from my personal tumblr on Confident

2014 and beyond

Well it is almost the close to yet another wonderful year and this is probably the first time in a very long time I am excited to embark upon a new year with so many possibilities and opportunities. This past year I have been so fortunate to be on an amazing journey meeting so many people who are positive, hard working and inspire me beyond what I never thought would achieve. This was also the year for me to take risks professionally and personally and plan to even go further. I learned that it's okay to fly, heights don't scare me as much as they used to in the past but what is to come in 2014 is continue to keep growing as a person and as an artist. Being on stage and knowing that even if it is just one person and making them smile is probably one of the greatest feelings ever and recently seeing people dance along with you while performing truly makes my night complete. And there are moments when I feel like giving up and walking away from it all but it is always the messages I receive from those who tell me not to and that is what makes it all worth it. I hope to be a role model for Eastern European girls for Native American girls to let them know that dreams can and do come true. One goal I have for 2014 is truly hope to expand within the Eastern European community even more so we need to support one another and the same within the Native American community. I am so blessed to be part of both worlds and couldn't ask for anything better. So yes, girls and guys never stop believing in your dreams, see you all in 2014.
#Believe

much love
Natalie

explaining romeo + juliet

People have always asked what romeo + juliet is about and basically it is about a girl who is completely into a guy and she knows he isn’t perfect because no one is, but regardless she’d be with him. It’s knowing that the guy has a past and she’s saying ‘hey, you’ve been through all this stuff before me, but I’m being patient, being that calm in the storm, like a peaceful existence for him’. I actually wrote it some time ago too after seeing some things about what happened to a really great guy and it just reminded me of Romeo and Juliet.  Most also don’t realise that Romeo loved Rosaline before he met Juliet and who the song is about only my super close friends know who he is. I would say majority of people don't know who I like romantically, because I tend to be very private in that nature. They’re the only ones where I can write something and they’d know exactly who/what I’m referring to. People may not realise it, but I'm actually a very passionate and romantic type of person yet very few people get to see that side of me and I kind of like that about myself. But in general, I think there is no better way to tell someone how you feel than to write a song for them.

-explaining romeo + juliet from my personal tumblr